February is usually the absolute worst time of the year for sports which pretty much makes it the worst time of the year for me. Football is over, spring training is a month away and there are so many hockey and basketball games in a season that I have a hard time caring about either until the playoffs or March Madness rolls around.
I know what you are thinking “there are so many hockey and basketball games”… but you love the 162 game baseball season? Hey, it is who I am.
Thankfully once every four years I can watch the Winter Olympics and February isn’t so bad.
Did I really just complain about February and not mention Valentine’s Day? The worst “holiday” known to man (and I mean man, not woman). I can’t stand that Hallmark invented a holiday to help sell their product and now this day is worshiped by the fairer sex. Makes me wonder what the NFL has to do to get the day after the Super Bowl to be a nationally recognized holiday. The Super Bowl is more relevant than Valentine's Day. Unless you consider the same crappy romantic comedy that is re-released every year as a relevant event.
Back to the Winter Olympics: I have never looked forward to watching the likes of curling, biathlon, skiing, snowboarding and speed skating and I still had plenty of time and emotions left to hate on ice dancing and figure skating. Is there really a difference between those two?
When else would I actually sit around and watch people playing shuffle board on a life sized table-made of ice?
I could care less about Shaun White or Apolo Ohno, but for two weeks I was rooting for them like they play center field at Wrigley Field. I had never even heard of this Shani character until these past two weeks but I hung on every race of his and watching him almost pull out the 1500m was drama!
United States Speed Skating even has its own website?!
What about names like Lindsey Vonn, Bode Miller, Gretchen Bleiler, Lindsey Jacobellis and Brian Rafalski? All names we can care about once every four years, but names I love rooting for once every four years.
…wait…that Rafalski guy plays in a league called the NLH or something, right? I guess we might see his name more than once every four years.
What about curling? I am dying to find a curling rink somewhere, slap on a sock over my shoe, pick up a broom and sweep a rock down to a circle. Maybe the curlglar will be there?
Some of these sports are only worth watching every four years. Sports like the moguls, ski jump, cross country or the biathlon are so boring and simple to watch that once every four years is enough. Activities like figure skating should never be shown in public ever again. The “men” in that sport need to eat a steak, smoke a cigar, put their hands down their pants and burp.
Some of the sports I think, if marketed properly, could become more mainstream. Like this hockey thing I watched on Sunday, brilliant sport. I hear they show it regularly on a channel called “Versus”? I checked my DirecTV program guide and I don’t see it…
What about speed skating? Especially the team event? There is so much going on there, people flying everywhere, the speed, the pace, the action, I think this could become mainstream. Let there be a little more pushing and shoving and get rid of the pads around the rink and I think we are onto the next big thing in the sporting world.
What if we gave the skaters sticks? Now we are talking.
How about a goal and some small road black object for them to swing at and try to put into a net? We could call it a puck.
Whoever scores the most goals wins! Now we are talking.
So it is all over, the games are finished, the U.S.A. showed that it is the most dominant country in the world athletically. We do it once every four years in the summer games and now we showed we can do it in the cold, on ice and snow and with heavy jackets on.
Now we can begin counting the days. Four days until spring training begins. 13 days until Selection Sunday. 17 days until we can all dance. 35 days until Opening Day and 39 days until Augusta National. We are currently in the sports calendars answer to Juan Pierre’s slugging percentage but soon enough we will be hitting all cylinders like Anderson Silva in the Octagon.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Do the Rockies have an “Ace”?
The term “Ace” gets thrown around very loosely in the baseball world. It is assumed that every team must have one and only one. This is not true.
I define an Ace as a pitcher who routinely starts 30 or more games a season, pitches over 200 innings, has a low ERA, dominant “stuff” that can be seen in strikeout numbers and gives his team a good chance to win every time he is on the mound. While I will say that winning 15-20 games a year is a very nice to have for an ace, I wouldn’t make it a requirement because there are definitely aces on poor offensive teams and even though the Ace might hold the opposing team to two runs his offense might only give him one. Should he really be held accountable for that loss?
There were 36 pitchers that threw over 200 innings and started more than 30 games in 2009 and 34 in 2008 but only 16 appear in both seasons. Now let’s take away those with an ERA north of 3.50 in either season and that leaves us with eight. Lastly, let’s take away any pitcher with less than 180 K’s in a season. We are left with five names: CC Sabathia, Roy Halladay, Tim Lincecum, Dan Haren and Zack Greinke.
If we extend the list to those with an ERA under 4.00 as opposed to 3.50...
...To read the rest of this article, click here.
I define an Ace as a pitcher who routinely starts 30 or more games a season, pitches over 200 innings, has a low ERA, dominant “stuff” that can be seen in strikeout numbers and gives his team a good chance to win every time he is on the mound. While I will say that winning 15-20 games a year is a very nice to have for an ace, I wouldn’t make it a requirement because there are definitely aces on poor offensive teams and even though the Ace might hold the opposing team to two runs his offense might only give him one. Should he really be held accountable for that loss?
There were 36 pitchers that threw over 200 innings and started more than 30 games in 2009 and 34 in 2008 but only 16 appear in both seasons. Now let’s take away those with an ERA north of 3.50 in either season and that leaves us with eight. Lastly, let’s take away any pitcher with less than 180 K’s in a season. We are left with five names: CC Sabathia, Roy Halladay, Tim Lincecum, Dan Haren and Zack Greinke.
If we extend the list to those with an ERA under 4.00 as opposed to 3.50...
...To read the rest of this article, click here.
Tony K suspended from ESPN for doing his job
Tony Korheiser was suspended for two weeks today by the heads of ESPN. Here is a really non-descript link from ESPN. Here is a much better link with more info from thebiglead.com. This little piece of news even made a website called "The Hollywood Gossip".
Here is what Kornheiser said:
This is most likely the outfit that Storm was wearing when Kornheiser made his comments:
Spot on if you ask me.
There are also rumors floating around (that I heard on 104.3 The Fan here in Denver tonight) that Kornheiser also made reference to Chris Berman and the fact that Berman lost 50-60 lbs and then gained it back. During the reference someone asked if "backbackback" is now referring to Berman gaining the weight. I love some good Berman humor, the dude is awful and went stale with his material 15 years ago. Why someone at ESPN doesn't ask him to come up with fresh material is beyond me.
Kornheiser is paid by ESPN to be funny, topical and his humor is based around sarcasm and poking fun at people, athletes, actors/actresses and government officials. I think he does a fantastic job and I apparently was even one of the few who thought he was really good on MNF. My opinion might be biased, but I think it is rediculous that ESPN prohibits its personalities from poking fun at other ESPN personalities. I know that somewhere Bill Simmons is saying "preach on!" (if he actually had any idea I existed and read this trash I am passing off as a "blog").
Is Storm really doing herself any favors by wearing what she wears on a daily basis?
Example 1
Example 2
Example 3
Example 4
While she does look OK for being 47 or 48, she IS FORTY-SEVEN or FORTY-EIGHT. Dress like it. The males on SC must wear business professional, why is it that Storm gets off wearing Call Girl Casual?
Believe me, someone better put a stop to the slutty wardrobe of Storm before other SC females think they can pull off the same attire. Heaven forbid we get more of this:
If Disney/ESPN is all high and mighty when it comes to issues like this and the Steve Phillips fiascso why don't they make the females dress respectable on TV? It is like they are trying to sell sex on TV with their female anchors (what nightly TV news doesn't have an attractive weather girl or anchor?). Unfortunately, they need to find better looking woman if this is their motive. Keep the 50 somethings in ankle length skirts and provide more Erin Andrews in provacative clothing.
Kornheiser was doing his job, on the radio, not on ESPN TV, let him do his job. If Simmons wants to write about how pathetic Berman is, let him. If you cannot laugh at yourself, you are going to lose a lot of respect.
Not that ESPN has a lot of respect anymore anyway. Let's not even go down the east coast bias highway.
Here is what Kornheiser said:
Hannah Storm in a horrifying, horrifying outfit today. She's got on red go-go boots and a catholic school plaid skirt. Way too short for somebody in her 40s or maybe early 50s by now. And she's got on her typically very, very tight shirt. So she looks like she's got sausage casing wrapping around her upper body... I know she's very good, and I'm not supposed to be critical of ESPN people..But, Hannah Storm, come on now!
This is most likely the outfit that Storm was wearing when Kornheiser made his comments:
Spot on if you ask me.
There are also rumors floating around (that I heard on 104.3 The Fan here in Denver tonight) that Kornheiser also made reference to Chris Berman and the fact that Berman lost 50-60 lbs and then gained it back. During the reference someone asked if "backbackback" is now referring to Berman gaining the weight. I love some good Berman humor, the dude is awful and went stale with his material 15 years ago. Why someone at ESPN doesn't ask him to come up with fresh material is beyond me.
Kornheiser is paid by ESPN to be funny, topical and his humor is based around sarcasm and poking fun at people, athletes, actors/actresses and government officials. I think he does a fantastic job and I apparently was even one of the few who thought he was really good on MNF. My opinion might be biased, but I think it is rediculous that ESPN prohibits its personalities from poking fun at other ESPN personalities. I know that somewhere Bill Simmons is saying "preach on!" (if he actually had any idea I existed and read this trash I am passing off as a "blog").
Is Storm really doing herself any favors by wearing what she wears on a daily basis?
Example 1
Example 2
Example 3
Example 4
While she does look OK for being 47 or 48, she IS FORTY-SEVEN or FORTY-EIGHT. Dress like it. The males on SC must wear business professional, why is it that Storm gets off wearing Call Girl Casual?
Believe me, someone better put a stop to the slutty wardrobe of Storm before other SC females think they can pull off the same attire. Heaven forbid we get more of this:
If Disney/ESPN is all high and mighty when it comes to issues like this and the Steve Phillips fiascso why don't they make the females dress respectable on TV? It is like they are trying to sell sex on TV with their female anchors (what nightly TV news doesn't have an attractive weather girl or anchor?). Unfortunately, they need to find better looking woman if this is their motive. Keep the 50 somethings in ankle length skirts and provide more Erin Andrews in provacative clothing.
Kornheiser was doing his job, on the radio, not on ESPN TV, let him do his job. If Simmons wants to write about how pathetic Berman is, let him. If you cannot laugh at yourself, you are going to lose a lot of respect.
Not that ESPN has a lot of respect anymore anyway. Let's not even go down the east coast bias highway.
Friday, February 12, 2010
I gots me some spring fever!
And the prescription is more top five lists!
I am dying for the snow to be gone, for good. No more cold, no more brown grass, no more slush on the streets and filthy car windows, no more jackets, socks, jeans or shoes. I want green grass, sandals, dry streets and clean cars. I want to golf. I want to drive with my windows down. I want to listen to Summertime and feel like it belongs.
So here are some of my top five lists as they relate to the summer.
My favorite summer smells:
5. Sun tan lotion
4. The ballpark
3. Rain
2. BBQ’s
1. Fresh cut grass
Favorite Colorado public golf courses:
5. Saddle Rock
4. Black Bear
3. The Ridge at Castle Pines
2. Fossil Trace
1. Riverdale Dunes
Favorite activities
5. Cutting the grass
4. Driving at night with the windows down
3. BBQ’ing
2. Attending baseball games
1. Golfing
Favorite Colorado dog track golf courses (aka, cheap)
5. Applewood
4. City Park
3. Buffalo Run
2. Fitzsimons
1. Aurora Hills
Favorite summer songs
5. Bird is the Word: Family Guy
4. Summer in the City: Lovin’ Spoonful
3. Margaritaville: Jimmy Buffet
2. Low Rider: War
1. Summertime: Fresh Prince
Which leads me to…favorite war movies
5. Schindler’s List
4. Black Hawk Down
3. Full Metal Jacket
2. Saving Private Ryan
1. Band of Brothers
Favorite summer sporting events
5. Nathan’s Hot Dog eating contest
4. All Star game
3. US Open
2. The Masters
1. Opening Day
Least favorite things about summer
5. Bugs (thankfully CO has very few)
4. The urge to eat ice cream, all the time
3. 100 degree days
2. Sweating
1. Sun burns
Please oh please can summer get here in a hurry?
I am dying for the snow to be gone, for good. No more cold, no more brown grass, no more slush on the streets and filthy car windows, no more jackets, socks, jeans or shoes. I want green grass, sandals, dry streets and clean cars. I want to golf. I want to drive with my windows down. I want to listen to Summertime and feel like it belongs.
So here are some of my top five lists as they relate to the summer.
My favorite summer smells:
5. Sun tan lotion
4. The ballpark
3. Rain
2. BBQ’s
1. Fresh cut grass
Favorite Colorado public golf courses:
5. Saddle Rock
4. Black Bear
3. The Ridge at Castle Pines
2. Fossil Trace
1. Riverdale Dunes
Favorite activities
5. Cutting the grass
4. Driving at night with the windows down
3. BBQ’ing
2. Attending baseball games
1. Golfing
Favorite Colorado dog track golf courses (aka, cheap)
5. Applewood
4. City Park
3. Buffalo Run
2. Fitzsimons
1. Aurora Hills
Favorite summer songs
5. Bird is the Word: Family Guy
4. Summer in the City: Lovin’ Spoonful
3. Margaritaville: Jimmy Buffet
2. Low Rider: War
1. Summertime: Fresh Prince
Which leads me to…favorite war movies
5. Schindler’s List
4. Black Hawk Down
3. Full Metal Jacket
2. Saving Private Ryan
1. Band of Brothers
Favorite summer sporting events
5. Nathan’s Hot Dog eating contest
4. All Star game
3. US Open
2. The Masters
1. Opening Day
Least favorite things about summer
5. Bugs (thankfully CO has very few)
4. The urge to eat ice cream, all the time
3. 100 degree days
2. Sweating
1. Sun burns
Please oh please can summer get here in a hurry?
The fab five
Last night, on a cool crisp February evening, team Buzzsaw rolled into Sobo’s ready to dominate.
And when I say dominate I mean scramble to ensure we have enough players to play for the night. An event that will likely occur every Thursday evening from now until May.
Needless to say we did find a fifth. She is the better half of the relationship loosely referred to as O’Nelvin. Dawn stepped up to the plate last night and helped carry the team to a great victory.
First up was Westy. He was one of two team Buzzsaw member’s that was feeling like Mrs. Sheen after a rowdy night of drinking with her husband. Westy stepped to the plate and took on the opposing team’s captain and a five handicap. It was a 3-4 race and Westy ran a great race.
Game one Westy ran four or five balls, including the 8-ball on the way to victory. Before I could finish my beer Westy had won 3-0.
Next up, the second half of the Charlie Sheen tirade who felt battered, bruised and like he was going to puke - you know, how most people feel after watching Two and a Half Men - Nick. Nick had yet to lose his virginity and win a game in week one of Buzzsaw madness, but in week two he laid the smack down on an opposing four handicap. He wasn’t distracted by the fact that his opponent was wearing a t-shirt made for an eight year old while he was an XXL kind of guy, he stepped on his neck for the fashion faux pas and ripped him 2-0.
After the two rousing victories it was my turn to bring the pain. I took on an opposing four and I played like a pissed off armadillo caught in a laundry bag. I clawed and fought my way to a 3-0 victory myself.
With our opponents running for the hill, with their tails between their legs, Dawn took a cue and used it like Donatello on a hoard of Foot Clan’s ninjas. She played an opposing female three and while her opponent played like a four, Dawn played like a nine! 2-0, SMACK DOWN!
With the team leading 4-0 our fearlessful captain Christine G sidled up to the table to take on the other teams seven. Unfortunately Galvin choked harder than Pam Anderson in a hot dog eating contest. He goes down in flames, 0-5.
All in all it was a good night as Buzzs…@#%^#%@!#$!!$
Static, dead air and a few moments of silence later…
Sorry about that, it was the opposite Travis writing this piece so far. Everything you have read, up to this point, is completely inaccurate. To quickly correct…
Westphal lost, to a five, 1-4 or 0-4.
Nick still has not broken through in the W column and lost 0-3.
I lost my match 1-3, mostly because I hit an 8-ball shot with my purse and not my wallet and left the first game literally in the pocket.
Dawn took her first L, 0-3.
Galvin played like a champ and beat the crap out of a three disguised as a seven, 4-0.
Another night at Sobo’s where Buzzsaw comes away with three meager points (thanks to bonus points for correct money and score sheet).
Next week is a new week. The team is showing improvement, despite our putrid record. The rust is starting to fall off and I think next week we break through with a 4-1 week. We are at home, again, against one of the Candlelight teams.
And when I say dominate I mean scramble to ensure we have enough players to play for the night. An event that will likely occur every Thursday evening from now until May.
Needless to say we did find a fifth. She is the better half of the relationship loosely referred to as O’Nelvin. Dawn stepped up to the plate last night and helped carry the team to a great victory.
First up was Westy. He was one of two team Buzzsaw member’s that was feeling like Mrs. Sheen after a rowdy night of drinking with her husband. Westy stepped to the plate and took on the opposing team’s captain and a five handicap. It was a 3-4 race and Westy ran a great race.
Game one Westy ran four or five balls, including the 8-ball on the way to victory. Before I could finish my beer Westy had won 3-0.
Next up, the second half of the Charlie Sheen tirade who felt battered, bruised and like he was going to puke - you know, how most people feel after watching Two and a Half Men - Nick. Nick had yet to lose his virginity and win a game in week one of Buzzsaw madness, but in week two he laid the smack down on an opposing four handicap. He wasn’t distracted by the fact that his opponent was wearing a t-shirt made for an eight year old while he was an XXL kind of guy, he stepped on his neck for the fashion faux pas and ripped him 2-0.
After the two rousing victories it was my turn to bring the pain. I took on an opposing four and I played like a pissed off armadillo caught in a laundry bag. I clawed and fought my way to a 3-0 victory myself.
With our opponents running for the hill, with their tails between their legs, Dawn took a cue and used it like Donatello on a hoard of Foot Clan’s ninjas. She played an opposing female three and while her opponent played like a four, Dawn played like a nine! 2-0, SMACK DOWN!
With the team leading 4-0 our fearlessful captain Christine G sidled up to the table to take on the other teams seven. Unfortunately Galvin choked harder than Pam Anderson in a hot dog eating contest. He goes down in flames, 0-5.
All in all it was a good night as Buzzs…@#%^#%@!#$!!$
Static, dead air and a few moments of silence later…
Sorry about that, it was the opposite Travis writing this piece so far. Everything you have read, up to this point, is completely inaccurate. To quickly correct…
Westphal lost, to a five, 1-4 or 0-4.
Nick still has not broken through in the W column and lost 0-3.
I lost my match 1-3, mostly because I hit an 8-ball shot with my purse and not my wallet and left the first game literally in the pocket.
Dawn took her first L, 0-3.
Galvin played like a champ and beat the crap out of a three disguised as a seven, 4-0.
Another night at Sobo’s where Buzzsaw comes away with three meager points (thanks to bonus points for correct money and score sheet).
Next week is a new week. The team is showing improvement, despite our putrid record. The rust is starting to fall off and I think next week we break through with a 4-1 week. We are at home, again, against one of the Candlelight teams.
Rockies get some love and the Big Hurt retires
Rockies get some love
Today the Colorado Rockies received some much deserved love from the national media. Peter Gammons, formerly of ESPN for like 50 years and now with MLB.com and MLB Network gave the Rockies some much needed credit and optimism.
In his piece he not only talks about the fact that the vast majority of the Rockies roster is composed from home grown talent, but that even the pitching staff is looking very deep and robust. Things the Rockies are not known for. In years past the Rockies tried big name free agents like Larry Walker, Denny Neagle and Mike Hampton and their pitching was obliterated on a daily basis; at home or on the road.
Now the Rockies have a team full of guys who are not national superstars, guys who are young and not very expensive and have a pitching staff that frustrates hitters at home or on the road. And the best part is that they are really good too.
A complete 180 from the team’s of the late 1990’s and early 2000’s.
Read Gammons piece, it is nicely done and I think it gives the Rockies credit they so rightfully deserve.
The Big Hurt retires
Frank Thomas, aka the Big Hurt, made it official today and retired from baseball at the age of 41.
Thomas played in an era that was marginalized by steroids, but the guy was big in 1990 when everyone was still small…he was and will always be a big guy and he always put a big hurt on the baseball.
To read the rest of this article click here.
Today the Colorado Rockies received some much deserved love from the national media. Peter Gammons, formerly of ESPN for like 50 years and now with MLB.com and MLB Network gave the Rockies some much needed credit and optimism.
In his piece he not only talks about the fact that the vast majority of the Rockies roster is composed from home grown talent, but that even the pitching staff is looking very deep and robust. Things the Rockies are not known for. In years past the Rockies tried big name free agents like Larry Walker, Denny Neagle and Mike Hampton and their pitching was obliterated on a daily basis; at home or on the road.
Now the Rockies have a team full of guys who are not national superstars, guys who are young and not very expensive and have a pitching staff that frustrates hitters at home or on the road. And the best part is that they are really good too.
A complete 180 from the team’s of the late 1990’s and early 2000’s.
Read Gammons piece, it is nicely done and I think it gives the Rockies credit they so rightfully deserve.
The Big Hurt retires
Frank Thomas, aka the Big Hurt, made it official today and retired from baseball at the age of 41.
Thomas played in an era that was marginalized by steroids, but the guy was big in 1990 when everyone was still small…he was and will always be a big guy and he always put a big hurt on the baseball.
To read the rest of this article click here.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Super Bowl vs World Series
My very worthless opinion on the difference between the Super Bowl and the World Series.
Commercials
Super Bowl: The real reason why 95% of the people who watch the Super Bowl are watching. While there are a lot of people like me who love watching football and are hoping for a good game, there is a better chance the commercials will be far superior than the game itself. Of course if you are a Colts or Saints fan then this is 100% wrong. I am hoping for a close game and some good laughs between the 11 minutes worth of actual football action in today’s 5 hour broadcast.
World Series: OK, this isn’t even close and I won’t pretend it is. The World Series is the Schlitz to the Super Bowl’s Budweiser.
Entertainment
Super Bowl: The Super Bowl is all about entertainment. In fact, it is becoming less and less about football and more and more about what other entertainment is going to be on display. From who is going to sing the National Anthem to who is going to be playing at halftime to the commercials to the prop bets available in Las Vegas (how many songs will the Who sing at half time, and no, this is not an Abbot and Costello routine).
World Series: Not so much about anything other than baseball. They might have some different stars of the music biz sing the National Anthem before the games, but the World Series doesn’t turn their usual four or five minute break between innings into 10 or 12 minute breaks, much as the Super Bowl turns its 15 minute half time into 30 minutes or more.
To read the rest of this article click here.
Commercials
Super Bowl: The real reason why 95% of the people who watch the Super Bowl are watching. While there are a lot of people like me who love watching football and are hoping for a good game, there is a better chance the commercials will be far superior than the game itself. Of course if you are a Colts or Saints fan then this is 100% wrong. I am hoping for a close game and some good laughs between the 11 minutes worth of actual football action in today’s 5 hour broadcast.
World Series: OK, this isn’t even close and I won’t pretend it is. The World Series is the Schlitz to the Super Bowl’s Budweiser.
Entertainment
Super Bowl: The Super Bowl is all about entertainment. In fact, it is becoming less and less about football and more and more about what other entertainment is going to be on display. From who is going to sing the National Anthem to who is going to be playing at halftime to the commercials to the prop bets available in Las Vegas (how many songs will the Who sing at half time, and no, this is not an Abbot and Costello routine).
World Series: Not so much about anything other than baseball. They might have some different stars of the music biz sing the National Anthem before the games, but the World Series doesn’t turn their usual four or five minute break between innings into 10 or 12 minute breaks, much as the Super Bowl turns its 15 minute half time into 30 minutes or more.
To read the rest of this article click here.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Buzzsaw is back!
Last night there was a reunion of epic proportions. A reunion of the best of the worst billiard team in the history of the Denver American Pool Association, south Denver sectional. It was a reunion of the team affectionately called “Buzzsaw” by its fearlessful captain, Chris G to the Alvin.
Me? I would rather refer to ourselves as the Wolfpack, a group that used to be a single wolf that grew by four and there are now five guys in the wolfpack. Only instead of cutting ourselves to be blood brothers we choose to chalk our cues without getting any chalk on the ferrule. So, so filthy.
After a four year hiatus the team is back and our old friends are still present and playing pool using bizarre random objects to mark pockets. And somehow I think the one guy with five teeth lost a few more since I last saw him.
The first up to break the new hymen of Buzzsaw was Travis, your fearless blogger. That’s right, I just mixed the word hymen into a blog post about billiards.
I played a guy who closely resembled a drunk that would be found under a bridge on Speer Blvd*. He was trying to pull off the unshaven look, but with the stubble and the dark rings around his eyes he more closely resembled a man who only sleeps when it is induced by a fifth of Jack followed a flask of Mad Dog 20/20.
I stepped up to the table and sank a ball off a nice kick, made an unbelievable cut shot and played defensive shots that would be admired by a college age chick fending off Paulie at Candlestick.
BANG! BOOM! POW!! I lose 0-4.
I set the tone for the rest of the night. Sure, I look like I have had more sleep and spent more time in a shower in the past 24 hours than my opponent has experienced in the past three months, but his pool skills were far superior. Priorities people, priorities.
Next to step to the table is Adam and he takes on an opposing 5. His opponent was showing so much forehead it would most likely be called a fivehead…but hey…he had hair down to his shoulders on the back of his dome. Maybe his hair was building up forces in the back of the head to fend off the impending doom of the massive amount of hair follicle killing troops coming from the front of his head?
Adam had the disease I like to refer to as “I think I am better than I really am”. He was trying to play cross pocket cut shots and full table length defenses, but had forgotten that he hadn’t held any sort of poking device longer than three inches in four years. While he did make some very good shots, the rust was still being shaken off and he lost 2-4**.
Next up was the new comer on team Buzzsaw and we shall begin calling him “Alan”. With his beard he reminded me of a character from Indiana Jones. It was obvious from the start that the pressure of three immensely talented pool players like myself, Adam and Westy was too much to overcome and Alan (aka Nick) went down in flames 0-2.
Westy’s turn. He strides to the table as proud as a man who sings about mauling zebras. However, he got knocked the FUCK OUT!
By a woman.
Westy falls harder than Adam for a fridge full of Miller Lite, 1-3***.
Sweeping in like the coolest of the cool was Mr. Strickland to save the day. After flying in from Connecticut just for the Buzzsaw reunion (while our captain was on vacation…) the Silver Fox is what we needed to get us over the hump and we were as excited as a bunch of gay boys sucking on Chinese nuts.
In his typical fashion of using 87% follow shots Paul beat a kid that looked like he was three white lines away from ending up on the floor of Famous Pizza asking for a Big Mac. Final score: 3-1.
Our final line on the night? 1-4. You cannot with the marathon in the first mile and next week we will look to press the gas pedal harder than a Toyota.
See my fellow Wolfpackians next Thursday at Sobo’s.
*While writing this briliance that can only be referred to as puke on the 'puter Lisa was watching CNN and they just talked about tea baggin' at a republican party with Sarah Palin. Count me IN. At least that is how I heard it.
**2-4 or something similar, I just know that he was handed a game because his opponent was nice enough to scratch on the 8. Adam still left the match feeling good about himself, his opponents girlfriend weighed more than Adam and she had a face that only a mother could slap with the ugly stick.
***Westy might have won more than one game, but I do know that he lost at least one because his opponent made the 8 ball in the wrong pocket. Reminds me of the time I tried on clothes at Abercrombie and Fitch - FAILBOAT!
Me? I would rather refer to ourselves as the Wolfpack, a group that used to be a single wolf that grew by four and there are now five guys in the wolfpack. Only instead of cutting ourselves to be blood brothers we choose to chalk our cues without getting any chalk on the ferrule. So, so filthy.
After a four year hiatus the team is back and our old friends are still present and playing pool using bizarre random objects to mark pockets. And somehow I think the one guy with five teeth lost a few more since I last saw him.
The first up to break the new hymen of Buzzsaw was Travis, your fearless blogger. That’s right, I just mixed the word hymen into a blog post about billiards.
I played a guy who closely resembled a drunk that would be found under a bridge on Speer Blvd*. He was trying to pull off the unshaven look, but with the stubble and the dark rings around his eyes he more closely resembled a man who only sleeps when it is induced by a fifth of Jack followed a flask of Mad Dog 20/20.
I stepped up to the table and sank a ball off a nice kick, made an unbelievable cut shot and played defensive shots that would be admired by a college age chick fending off Paulie at Candlestick.
BANG! BOOM! POW!! I lose 0-4.
I set the tone for the rest of the night. Sure, I look like I have had more sleep and spent more time in a shower in the past 24 hours than my opponent has experienced in the past three months, but his pool skills were far superior. Priorities people, priorities.
Next to step to the table is Adam and he takes on an opposing 5. His opponent was showing so much forehead it would most likely be called a fivehead…but hey…he had hair down to his shoulders on the back of his dome. Maybe his hair was building up forces in the back of the head to fend off the impending doom of the massive amount of hair follicle killing troops coming from the front of his head?
Adam had the disease I like to refer to as “I think I am better than I really am”. He was trying to play cross pocket cut shots and full table length defenses, but had forgotten that he hadn’t held any sort of poking device longer than three inches in four years. While he did make some very good shots, the rust was still being shaken off and he lost 2-4**.
Next up was the new comer on team Buzzsaw and we shall begin calling him “Alan”. With his beard he reminded me of a character from Indiana Jones. It was obvious from the start that the pressure of three immensely talented pool players like myself, Adam and Westy was too much to overcome and Alan (aka Nick) went down in flames 0-2.
Westy’s turn. He strides to the table as proud as a man who sings about mauling zebras. However, he got knocked the FUCK OUT!
By a woman.
Westy falls harder than Adam for a fridge full of Miller Lite, 1-3***.
Sweeping in like the coolest of the cool was Mr. Strickland to save the day. After flying in from Connecticut just for the Buzzsaw reunion (while our captain was on vacation…) the Silver Fox is what we needed to get us over the hump and we were as excited as a bunch of gay boys sucking on Chinese nuts.
In his typical fashion of using 87% follow shots Paul beat a kid that looked like he was three white lines away from ending up on the floor of Famous Pizza asking for a Big Mac. Final score: 3-1.
Our final line on the night? 1-4. You cannot with the marathon in the first mile and next week we will look to press the gas pedal harder than a Toyota.
See my fellow Wolfpackians next Thursday at Sobo’s.
*While writing this briliance that can only be referred to as puke on the 'puter Lisa was watching CNN and they just talked about tea baggin' at a republican party with Sarah Palin. Count me IN. At least that is how I heard it.
**2-4 or something similar, I just know that he was handed a game because his opponent was nice enough to scratch on the 8. Adam still left the match feeling good about himself, his opponents girlfriend weighed more than Adam and she had a face that only a mother could slap with the ugly stick.
***Westy might have won more than one game, but I do know that he lost at least one because his opponent made the 8 ball in the wrong pocket. Reminds me of the time I tried on clothes at Abercrombie and Fitch - FAILBOAT!
Friday, January 29, 2010
The Pro-Bowl
What a joke…
AFC
Offense
QB:Peyton Manning, Philip Rivers, Tom Brady, Matt Schaub, Vince Young, David Garrard
RB: Chris Johnson, Maurice Jones-Drew, Ray Rice
FB: Le'Ron McClain
WR:Reggie Wayne, Wes Welker, Andre Johnson, Brandon Marshall, Chad Ochocinco, Vincent Jackson
TE:Dallas Clark, Antonio Gates, Heath Miller
T:Jake Long, Ryan Clady, Joe Thomas, D'Brickashaw Ferguson
G: Logan Mankins, Alan Faneca, Kris Dielman
C:Jeff Saturday, Nick Mangold, Kevin Mawae
Defense
DE:Dwight Freeney, Robert Mathis, Mario Williams, Kyle Vanden Bosch, Shaun Ellis
DT: Haloti Ngata, Vince Wilfork, Casey Hampton
OLB:Brian Cushing, Elvis Dumervil, James Harrison, LaMarr Woodley
ILB: Ray Lewis, DeMeco Ryans
CB: Darrelle Revis, Nnamdi Asomugha, Champ Bailey
FS:Antoine Bethea, Jairus Byrd, Ed Reed, Brandon Meriweather
SS: Brian Dawkins, Yeremiah Bell
Special Teams
P: Shane Lechler
PK:Nate Kaeding, Dan Carpenter
KR: Josh Cribbs
ST: Kassim Osgood
LSnapper: Jon Condo
NFC
Offense
QB:Drew Brees, Brett Favre, Aaron Rodgers, Donovan McNabb, Tony Romo
RB:Steven Jackson, Adrian Peterson, DeAngelo Williams, Frank Gore
FB: Leonard Weaver
WR:Larry Fitzgerald, Sydney Rice, DeSean Jackson, Miles Austin, Steve Smith, Roddy White
TE: Vernon Davis, Jason Witten
T:Jonathan Stinchcomb, Jason Peters, Bryant McKinnie, David Diehl
G:Jahri Evans, Steve Hutchinson, Leonard Davis, Chris Snee
C:Jonathan Goodwin, Andre Gurode, Shaun O'Hara, Ryan Kalil
Defense:
DE: Jared Allen, Julius Peppers, Trent Cole
DT:Kevin Williams, Darnell Dockett, Jay Ratliff, Justin Smith
OLB:Lance Briggs, DeMarcus Ware, Brian Orakpo, Clay Matthews
ILB:Jonathan Vilma, Patrick Willis, London Fletcher, Jon Beason
CB:Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie, Charles Woodson, Asante Samuel, Terence Newman, Mike Jenkins
FS:Darren Sharper, Nick Collins, Antrel Rolle
SS:Roman Harper, Adrian Wilson, Quintin Mikell
Special Teams:
P: Andy Lee
PK: David Akers
KR: Johnny Knox
ST: Heath Farwell
LSnapper: Jon Dorenbos
That is a whole lot of crossed off names. What a joke the NFL Pro Bowl is.
Best suggestion I have heard is that they should turn this whole thing into a post season dinner/award ceremony of some sorts. Ditch the Pro Bowl altogether.
AFC
Offense
QB:
RB: Chris Johnson, Maurice Jones-Drew, Ray Rice
FB: Le'Ron McClain
WR:
TE:
T:
G: Logan Mankins, Alan Faneca, Kris Dielman
C:
Defense
DE:
DT: Haloti Ngata, Vince Wilfork, Casey Hampton
OLB:
ILB: Ray Lewis, DeMeco Ryans
CB: Darrelle Revis, Nnamdi Asomugha, Champ Bailey
FS:
SS: Brian Dawkins, Yeremiah Bell
Special Teams
P: Shane Lechler
PK:
KR: Josh Cribbs
ST: Kassim Osgood
LSnapper: Jon Condo
NFC
Offense
QB:
RB:
FB: Leonard Weaver
WR:
TE: Vernon Davis, Jason Witten
T:
G:
C:
Defense:
DE: Jared Allen, Julius Peppers, Trent Cole
DT:
OLB:
ILB:
CB:
FS:
SS:
Special Teams:
P: Andy Lee
PK: David Akers
KR: Johnny Knox
ST: Heath Farwell
LSnapper: Jon Dorenbos
That is a whole lot of crossed off names. What a joke the NFL Pro Bowl is.
Best suggestion I have heard is that they should turn this whole thing into a post season dinner/award ceremony of some sorts. Ditch the Pro Bowl altogether.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
The younger side of the Colorado Rockies
Yesterday I poked some fun at the Rockies and their offseason signings being over 30 and a lot of them are well over 30 and closer to 40. Today we can look at some of the young talent in the Rockies farm system now that the yearly prospect rankings are starting to come out.
Last night MLB Network discussed MLB.com’s top 50 prospect rankings, which can be found here.
Yesterday Keith Law over at ESPN released his organizational rankings and today his top 100 list was published. Lastly, KLaw, as he is affectionately glossed, also released his top 10 prospects by organization. You will need EPSN Insider to read any of Keith Law’s content.
So how did the Rockies rank?
Read the rest of this article here.
Last night MLB Network discussed MLB.com’s top 50 prospect rankings, which can be found here.
Yesterday Keith Law over at ESPN released his organizational rankings and today his top 100 list was published. Lastly, KLaw, as he is affectionately glossed, also released his top 10 prospects by organization. You will need EPSN Insider to read any of Keith Law’s content.
So how did the Rockies rank?
Read the rest of this article here.
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